The Remedy Files: Illusion Page 12

  I keep my eyes forward on the audience. Familiar faces are spread all throughout. There seems to be a bigger crowed than they were anticipating because people are standing next to the filled seats. The stage lights prevent me from seeing all of the rows but it looks like a strong crowd came out to watch. There are twenty seats blocked off in the front row for us to exit to once our Future announcements have been made.

  Without being able to look to my right, I can only imagine that all the guys came out the same time we did or maybe even right before. Because when the last girl sits down, the applause drifts off.

  The Community Board members begin to filter in one by one on each side of the stage, walking to the seats lined in the middle. When all ten of them are standing in front of their chairs, nine sit down in unison as the President of the Board, and the shortest of them all, Mr. Pancolietta, remains standing. He then strolls to the microphone in front of the stage, waving to the crowd in a pageant-like fashion as the audience continues their clapping. Mr. Pancolietta remains quiet until the noise dies down.

  “Today, ladies and gentlemen,” He begins, the wind blowing through the few dark hairs he has left on his head which are always worn combed over to the side. “Is a special day. It is a day we wait for every single year as it celebrates a new Level of Impetus entering adulthood and the beginning of the rest of their lives.” The crowd erupts into clapping again and Mr. Pancolietta waits a few seconds before continuing. “This Level has spent the past seventeen years, enjoying life in the community, learning about the ways of Impetus, and how to contribute to keep us remaining as a sustainable community. We have been able to survive over the past fifty years since The Before and it is from raising such intelligent contributors to Impetus that makes this possible!” Another round of applause echoes through the sky.

  “The Community Board has been taking careful notes on this year’s Level 17, making sure we are observing every single significant contribution they make and documenting every talent that seems to come so natural to them. There are a lot of talents in this group, I tell you!” He makes this same stiff attempt at a joke every year which leaves several audience members laughing.

  Mr. Pancioletta beams at what he deems to be a successful result and continues on with his speech. “What is important to our Future as a Community is to make sure our young people are brought into their adulthood in roles that will make both them and Impetus successful. We spend years gathering the data to make sure the decisions for their future are the absolute best and right ones to make. Both the Paired and Unpaired are incredibly important to our community. They keep it running and functioning to ensure a bright future that doesn’t end in the mistakes that The Before made. Every single role is crucial and every single person is valued. There is no role more important than the others.” An obvious lie. I have to resist the urge to glance at Jacqueline to see her expression.

  “We have an interesting alignment in this year’s Level where there are exactly ten males and ten females. Please keep in mind that despite the even numbers, we still evaluate each person on their own as to whether they are a fit for the Paired or Unpaired future. We will never risk a future just to honor even numbers.” Another lie. I personally heard them say they will pair two people who weren’t supposed to! They just made that change!

  I want to scream from my chair. I want to tell them I know- that I overheard the conversation! That the Doctor even is on it! My boss, the man who I’ve worked under for the past four years knows the truth that is being hidden from the rest of us!

  Instead of screaming, I squirm in my chair, adjusting my dress over and over again as Mr. Pancioletta drowns on.

  “So, with no further ado, let’s begin this year’s Ceremonial Pairing!” Explosions of approval echo from the crowd. “As you all know, we will start by calling the females one by one. When each one steps up to the front, they will stand right here-“ he points at the red X in front of him. “-as I read what their future will be. If it is a Paired match, when I call the male’s name, I want him to join me right here-“he points at the blue X in front of him. “-so I can announce them in front of Impetus and make the Pairing official. Please hold your applause until each future has been announced.”

  I need to do something about this. Right now. The microphone isn’t too far away. I could simply stand up and tell everyone about all the lies. About how our wrist monitors work outside Impetus walls and there are other communities that they don’t tell us about. That our futures can be changed the day before the ceremony and that they’re just a tool they use to cover their needs and fix their own mistakes. About how they obviously don’t care about us or our lives like they claim because they purposely terminate young people and babies. They kill us off like we’re nothing whenever they choose.

  If the Community Board tries to deny it, I have the papers I copied and could hold them up for everyone to see. They won’t be able to punish me- not in front of everyone who will be able to see that I’m telling the truth.

  I count the number of steps to the microphone. I could do it. In just fifteen steps, I could save us all.

  CHAPTER 17

  Instead of revealing the truth, I sit. I can’t will my body to move. If Gavin was here, he would help me. Right now, I don’t have anyone. I wish I had told Jacqueline and enlisted her help. I can’t do something this big on my own.

  Mr. Pancioletta continues on with his announcements. “Our first Level 17 graduate today is Adeline!” I hear shuffling behind me as Adeline must be making her way out of the back row. I watch as she comes around in my vision, wearing a golden yellow dress with orange tones that looks like it could be a beautiful sunset in the distance. She gracefully strolls straight to the red marked spot with her head held high, keeping her eyes focused on the crowd in front of her.

  “Adeline’s future will be as…” Mr. Pancioletta pauses for a dramatic flair before saying, “a Paired! Her Paired match will be Bryan. Bryan, come on up!” I watch as Bryan walks up to the blue marked spot with a smile on his face. Mr. Pancioletta stands in between them, connecting their hands and says, “Adeline, your future role will be that of a Food Cooperative Order Assistant. Bryan, yours will be of a Cooperative Furniture Maker. Your last names moving forward will be Balltine. Please make sure you get your job and housing assignment from the Ceremony assistant as you exit to your left and join the audience. Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce Mr. and Mrs. Bryan and Adeline Balltine!” The crowd applauds once again as Bryan and Adeline exit the stage. Within a few minutes, I see them appear by the audience and take the first two of the twenty seats available, holding thick packets in their hands.

  “Our next graduate today is Jacqueline!” I sit up straighter and watch the blue figure only three seats down from me stand up. Jacqueline gracefully glides to the red spot on stage. Even from the back, she looks amazing- almost statuesque.

  Mr. Pancioletta delivers Jacqueline’s future in the same way he did Adeline’s. “Jacqueline’s future will be as… a Paired! Her Paired match will be Ethan. Ethan, come on up!”

  Good! At least they made one right decision with pairing those two. I would give anything to read Caroline’s thoughts right now! I still can’t believe that she thought she would have been Ethan’s pair. And it’s good that it wasn’t me. I’m not sure if Jacqueline would have ever talked to me again if the Board made that mistake.

  As Ethan comes to the front of the stage, Mr. Pancioletta connects their hands together. He continues, “Jacqueline, your future role will be as Park & Recreation Assistant.”

  Oh, that’s perfect for her! She won’t be the next Doctor afterall. She will be outside coordinating games for Impetus like she prefers.

  “Ethan, your future will be as a Lightstones Guard. Your last names moving forward will be Manetell. Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Ethan and Jacqueline Manetell!”

  Jacqueline and Ethan exit the stage together and soon appear next to Adeline and Bryan in t
he audience with their own packets in their hands. As soon as she sits down, she looks directly at me and beams. I give her a little smile in return, trying to not draw too much attention to myself.

  Jacqueline’s future became exactly how she wanted it to be. She got everything she wanted. Her faith in the system never wavered and it paid off.

  But she hasn’t heard everything I have over the past few days. Although with Jacqueline, I’m not sure if that would change anything for her. She believes in the little control she does have and knows it can be used to make life as she wants it. I find myself wishing I let her rub off on me a bit more throughout the years. I wish I took notice of that earlier and tried to be the same way.

  Yet here I am. Confused about what sort of future I want for myself even on the day that it’s going to be decided. I’m more perplexed about everything I’ve heard, everything I’ve seen in just the last few days. Something isn’t right. This place, it’s not what they claim it to be. They aren’t always telling us the truth.

  The females in my Level are being called one by one to the stage. Caroline is the fifth one. She’s wearing a long red dress that almost looks a bit too formal for this event. I notice her walking strangely and realize they must have put a rod behind her leg until it fully heals properly. She should have still been in her hospital stay but it doesn’t surprise me that she fought her way out.

  I think back to the conversation I overheard the Doctor having on the phone late that night when I had snuck back in for my Remedy pills. They made the decision to change Caroline’s future that night. She has no clue that what they are able to reveal to her is new… and I can’t stop wondering who else that change is going to affect now.

  Then a thought hits me. One that should have clicked last night. No, the Doctor wasn’t talking about Caroline that night or any of us in the graduating Level, for that matter. The night I overheard his conversation on the phone, he was talking about the Breesmain family. He was talking about Angela and Liam! They were already making the plans for what was officially approved: the terminations.

  My thoughts take over again as the rest of the Ceremony unfolds. In a distracted haze, I watch with unfocused eyes as Caroline gets paired with Damian and other classmates have their Future revealed as well. I’m back to thinking about Gavin and how I need to get to him as soon as possible. I unconsciously pat my side under my armpit where the copied confidential papers are still hiding.

  “Um… Evangeline… Evangeline.”

  I snap back into reality the audience is stifling their laughs and Mr. Pancioletta is turned around, waving me up to the spot. Without thinking about how my head should remain focused to the front, I whip it around and notice that I’m the last girl to be called. All the other girls are gone. I try to think back to what I’ve seen when my mind was occupied. Every single person was paired. Which guy is left? Is it just me and one other guy?

  “Evangeline!” Mr. Pancioletta says louder now.

  I’m the last person they are calling today. Last night’s change- it had to be... It had to be me! I can’t be paired. Not if I know this isn’t what they had in mind for me. They are setting me up for a future to make up for a mistake they made! It’s not supposed to be my future!

  The fog and the blurs of circling lights move into my mind. I awkwardly walk to the middle of the stage, focusing on keeping my coordination in the special ceremonial heels and my eyes transfixed on the red mark. My knees are wobbly but I cannot tell if it’s from the shoes or from the way I have spent all night thinking about the millions of endings this ceremony could have today.

  Who is left? Think, Evangeline, I tell myself. Who is left?

  “Apparently it’s been a long day for everyone.” Mr.Pancioletta tries in a weak effort to crack another joke. A few more laughs from the audience encourage his attempt.

  “Evangeline’s future will be as…” Mr. Pancioletta begins announcing.

  I squeeze my eyes tightly together. I want to run. This can’t happen- they can’t do this to us. There has to be more.

  All of the background noise seems to fade as Mr. Pancioletta’s words sound like bombs bursting in my ears.

  “…a Paired!”

  No! That wasn’t supposed to be it! You are screwing with my future! I want to shout so badly. I’m listening to lies and I know this. I scan the audience and watch them with big smiles on their faces. No one else knows the truth except me! No, I take it back, the Community Board knows too. They were all part of the change. Everyone else is being duped- and they think I’m included.

  “Your Paired Match will be Brennan. Brennan, come on up!” I again rebelliously turn my head and watch as Brennan ever so slowly walks to stand on his blue marked spot.

  “This, ladies and gentlemen, is a pinnacle moment in Impetus! For the first time ever, we have had a Level with an even amount of girls and boys that have actually made ten perfect pairs! You all are witnessing a moment right now that will go down in the Community’s history!” Mr. Pancioletta steps between Brennan and I, taking our hands and holding them high in the air as the crowd stands to applaud.

  No… no… no… no…. no… is all I can think.

  Baby Breesmain enters my mind. If the pairings are so people can begin a family but yet Impetus decides that the baby should be terminated, what are you left with and what then is the purpose of the pairings? What is the reason of this life at all if they are the only ones calling all the shots?

  Mr. Pancioletta begins to join my hand with Brennan’s. I jerk my hand down fiercly. Mr. Pancioletta turns to me, his eyes wide.

  “No.” I whisper.

  “Excuse me?” Mr. Pancioletta’s voice echoes through the microphone.

  “No.” I say stronger this time.

  A roar of shushes passes through the crowd as the noises fade.

  The smile on Mr. Pancioletta’s face disappears but then he quickly replaces it and says in the microphone. “Evangeline, your future role will be as a–“

  “NO!” I shout it this time. He needs to hear this; everyone does. I don’t want this. I’m not going to take a future that wasn’t meant to be mine. One that’s a cover up, nonetheless, a lie for the rest of my life. This is my life they are treating so carelessly! Just like the lives of Angela and Baby Breesmain. They act like they care about us. But they don’t. They so obviously don’t!

  There are multiple beeps that arise from the crowd and from the corner of my eye, I can see the Remedy Regulators fast at work to get the beeping under control.

  I watch Mr. Pancioletta’s knuckles turn white as his grip on the microphone tightens. He reaches into his pocket and takes out a Remedy pill and pops it into his mouth. I believe I see Brennan finally let out his breath as though he was holding it. There’s a hint of a smile on his face.

  As I scan the audience, I can see their eyes darting from my face to that of Mr. Pancioletta. Jacqueline is looking at me and I can’t tell what she’s thinking at all. There’s no sign, just a blank look that blinks every 20 seconds.

  Doctor Bordine stands up from his seat with the Board members and strides quickly to the front, taking the microphone from Mr. Pancioletta and says, “I deeply apologize to the Community. Evangeline had a bit of an accident yesterday causing her to have a profound concussion. I wanted her to be a part of today since it is so pivotal but apparently it was a bit too soon. We will need to get her back to the Clinic,” he snaps his fingers to a couple of Guards standing in the shadows to the right of the stage. I didn’t notice them before. They blend in with the stage’s background. “We will keep you all posted on her status.”

  Before I can stop it, I’m being scooped up by one of the men. “NO!” I shout once again. “This is all a--” I feel a sharp pain in the side of my neck. I snap my head to where the pain originated and see the other strange man quickly slide a syringe back in his pocket.

  My words suddenly become mumbled. I can’t speak.

  My thoughts however are once again on overdrive. W
hat’s going to happen now? Will they try to pair me with Brennan again? If not, what’s going to happen with Brennan? What will they do with me? Are they going to punish me for what I did? I’ve never read any law about refusing the Community’s future plans for a person. It should be as much my say as it is theirs, right?

  A different sort of fog is starting to cover me. I can see my hair being whipped in my face. We must be traveling fast. It suddenly looks like it’s getting darker and I realize I can’t keep my eyes open.

  Despite all my thoughts, I know that I made the right decision. I wonder what Gavin will think of it all or if he already knew what I would do. Regardless, I fall into the most peaceful sleep I have had in a while, knowing that the ceremony I have analyzed for so long is finally over. I can finally move on. First thing I will do when I awake is go find Gavin.

  PART II

  CHAPTER 18

  My eyes flutter open. Orange, yellow and red circles swirl all around. A cast of light is filtering through the dark sky. Everything is blurry. I can’t make out any of the shapes. There is a loud ringing sound in my ears. It amplifies in noise, fades, and repeats the cycle over and over again. I cover them in desperation to try to block out the clamor but am only successful in slightly muffling it.

  From the corner of my eye, I can see the blinking of my wrist monitor. I pull one hand off my ear to look at it. That’s where the noise is coming from. The light is yellow. I need Remedy immediately.

  My knees are to my chest and I can feel a cold, flat surface beneath me. I stretch out my legs and my feet bang on a hard wall as a momentous sharp pain shoots throughout my body. “Owww!” I try to yell out but my throat is purely raw as though sandpaper was relentlessly scrubbed against it. I let out a whimper instead and pull my knees back in.